The reason I haven't written lately
is because I've been confronted
with something I didn't expect when coming here.
It's been an unsettling process
and I've felt quite confused at times.





I thought I came here for inspiration
and to lay the foundation for my next album.
My intention was to widen my perspectives
and temporarily escape
my secure, well known routes and patterns.
But I didn't expect to become accustomed
to the buzz and hum of the city,
the tempo and liveliness on the streets
and the never ending exploration of mystery and opportunity.
And I hadn't expected
to actually connect with the soul of the city
and truly feel the love of New York.





One day as I stepped out on the street
and the vibrant energy of a busy Union Square hit me
I realized that I wasn't gonna leave as easily from here
as I had previously thought.
My idea was just to visit and enjoy,
soak it all in and then get out.
But NYC has gotten to me.

I didn't want to rant about my feelings
of passing a point of no return
before my inner chaos had settled
and I could see through the drama
with firm ground beneath my feet.

Now I've been here for almost two months.
I haven't been focusing on the music
as much as I thought I would.
There's a lot of inspiration here for sure
and as soon as I turn to my computer
the sounds come alive.
But still, my journey doesn't seem to be
about spending time in the studio, facing the monitors.
But rather about exposing myself
to the vibe and flow of Her grace,
making me see that there's a mysterious path for me
amidst skyskrapers, homeless people,
billionaires and grafitti tags.



Then again,
I have all my friends, family
and everyone I love in Stockholm.
But if I deny the signs
and resist the flow of the current
so lovingly leading me through this amazing yet monstrous city
I may never have the chance to give myself fully
to an adventure like this again.
Later in life things may look very different.
Practical stuff. Like the year 2012 approaching.
Also dad died a few years back
and mom isn't getting any younger...
Things like that.
There will most probably come a day
when I need to be in Sweden anyway.
So if I want to go for this ride
it's now or never.



And I ask myself:
As an earnest seeker
and contemporary mystic,
do I dare to forfeit my personal invitation
to spend a few years in the capitol of dreams
and do my journey through the most auspicious
and mythical concrete jungles of my time?

This is where I am.
And though I'm supposedly so far away from home
I still feel more in tune with my destiny than ever.

New York looks at me. She smiles.
Knowing exactly what I go through.
Watching my every move.
Awaiting my response.
Anticipating my surrender.
Challenging my commitment
and testing my faith.



"This time I've reached the point of no return..."
- Mixed Blood